Helps’ Limericks & Jokes

The Legend of Wanda Sue

Wanda Sue was soon fired from the restaurant since she passed hours over the sink scrubbing her hands with steel wool in a vain attempt to remove a tattooed message indelibilely displayed between her knuckles. The message was only decipherable when the hands were interlaced.

The left hand read:

L  T  F  C

While the right hand completed:

E  S  U  K

(upside down to be legible as a whole)

Her remorse was indubitably linked to the inevitable grammatical error contained in this expression: The human body simply could not accomodate the missing apostrophe!

Helps' friend chose to share Wanda Sue's masterpiece: a poem which remained an all-time favorite. It was the only work of literature which received equal admiration from all camps. Helps never encountered such an example of universal renown.

He evangelistically transmitted the text to hundreds, perhaps thousands of people. A soirée chez Helps was never complete without a fervent and emphatic recitation of Wanda Sue's poem. The true identity of its author remained shrouded in reverential mystery, yet each secretly asked in his heart of hearts, "Who was Wanda Sue?"